Archive for Spider-Man

Superhero Makeovers: Spider-Man (revised for 2015)

Posted in Comic Books, Rants, Superhero Makeovers with tags , , , , , , , , on January 19, 2015 by Charlie Brooks

Ah, used to be so cool.And a lean, silent figure slowly fades into the gathering darkness, aware at last that in this world, with great power there must also come — great responsibility!

Spider-Man used to be one of my favorite comic book characters. Now he’s not. Those who have read one particular storyline can probably guess why. If you can’t, we’ll be getting to that soon enough.

I originally took a look at Spider-Man’s history in 2010, and a few things have changed since them. So here’s a revised look at the evolution of New York City’s friendly neighborhood wall-crawler. Continue reading

Comic Rants: DC’s Ban on Gay Marriage and Other Reasons I Hate the Big Two

Posted in Comic Books, Rants with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on September 9, 2013 by Charlie Brooks

Too bad we can't have nice things.I can hear somebody is DC Comics’ PR department responding already: “It’s not actually a ban on gay marriage.” Well fuck you, imaginary PR guy, and let me explain why.

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Superheroes are Bastards, Marvel Edition

Posted in Comic Books, Rants with tags , , , on June 26, 2013 by Charlie Brooks

Honestly, Reed Richards might be the worst of them all.Previously in my uber-cynical breakdown of superheroes becoming horrible people, I looked at some of the paragons of the DC Universe. Now it’s time to take a look at the Marvel Universe.

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Review Roundup: Spider-Man versus Thor

Posted in Comic Books, Rants with tags , , , on December 14, 2012 by Charlie Brooks

Spider-Hulk, Spider-Hulk, does whatever a Spider-Hulk can...This week, I continued looking at some Hulked-Out Hero books and was sad I did. Basically, as part of World War Hulks, a bunch of Marvle heroes turned into Hulk-like beings. There were a few mini-series that were these Hulked-out superheroes slugging it out for no reason. They mostly revolve around jokes about how the Hulk’s speech patterns sound stupid.

The bad news is that this week’s reviews are about the weakest of the miniseries. Next week I’ll do Captain America versus Wolverine, which was actually pretty decent. Until then, take the rare moment to enjoy me giving level-headed criticism instead of acting like a chimp with poor impulse control.

World War Hulks: Spider-Man versus Thor #1

World War Hulks: Spider-Man versus Thor #2

Thou Shalt not Kill

Posted in Comic Books, Rants with tags , , , , , , on April 13, 2011 by Charlie Brooks

Suuuuure it is, Bats.One of the oldest traditions in superhero comics is that the good guys don’t kill. There are exceptions out there, such as Wolverine, who is currently leading a child-killing death-squad in X-Force (okay, they only killed one child so far, and the repercussions are being handled pretty well) or the Punisher, whose body count is somewhere in the thousands. But in general, superheroes haven’t killed since the Silver Age or even before. But the question is, why? Certainly some villains (*cough*Joker*cough*) deserve their necks snapped. Why is it that these guys who dress up in pajamas and pursue vigilante justice don’t do what sometimes needs to be done?

In an attempt to answer that question, or at least look at how the code against killing developed, here’s a look at some of the more iconic superheroes and why they don’t kill.

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Crowning Deaths of Awesome and Sadness

Posted in Comic Books, Crowning Moments of Awesome, Rants with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 25, 2011 by Charlie Brooks

Yeah, Superman is on the list.Comic book deaths are a punchline these days. A few years ago when Captain America died, no one expected the death to last more than two years, even though Marvel swore up and down that it would stick (sort of like how Spider-Man unmasking during Civil War was supposed to stick and not get retconned away thanks to a deal with the Devil). Despite the fact that a comic book death currently translates into little more than a cheap sales gimmick, there have still been some really good ones over the years. Even if they didn’t stick, they were chilling, touching, or otherwise hugely influential. What follows is my totally biased opinion of the best deaths comics has had to offer.

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Superman and Lois Lane versus Spider-Man and Mary Jane

Posted in In This Corner with tags , , , on February 15, 2011 by Charlie Brooks

Which one of these men is the bigger dick?If DC Comics made a dollar for every time Superman killed Lois Lane during the Silver Age, they’d probably be the second-largest comic book company in America or something. Superman used to kill Lois Lane on a monthly basis. I didn’t think anyone could be more of a dick to the woman he loved until recently when Spider-Man sold his marriage to the Devil. So now I’m wondering who the bigger dick is. Why not pit the two sides against each other in a fight? Will Superman kill Lois Lane in the first round? Will Spider-Man use Mary Jane as bait? Will the women team up to throw off the shackles of their spandex-clad oppressors? Let’s find out.

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