It’s time for gaming humor to shine. The Knights of the Dinner Table is probably the best gaming-related comic in print today. Featuring the adventures of a group of hack and slash gamers, the comic has been in print for over a decade, and has also given birth to several spin-off magazines – not to mention the entire Hackmaster line of role-playing products. Taking them on is the Order of the Stick, which is another gaming-based comic that primarily makes jokes about Dungeons & Dragons. The Order is not actually composed of gamers, but is actually a band of stick figure adventurers. Still, the spirit remains the same. This fight will feature several mini-bouts, as Bob, Dave, Sara, and Brian of the Knights take on Roy, Haley, Vaarsuvius, Durkan, Elan, and Belkar of the Order. The Order of the Stick has the advantage of numbers, but the Knights of the Dinner Table have the advantage of experience. Plus, the Knights don’t have Elan the bard in their group. That’s got to even things out a bit right there.
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These combatants are no stranger to one another. Godzilla is the one who put and end to the Knights’ championship run a while back. The Knights of the Dinner Table retreated and have been planning their vengeance ever since. We’ll see what tricks they have up their sleeves this time around, and whether that will be enough to score a win over the king of all monsters.
The reigning page champions, the Knights of the Dinner Table are the best damned gamers in the town of Muncie. Known for their remarkable devotion to lucky dice, and their penchant for killing nameless NPCs, they have hacked and slashed their ways into gamers’ hearts. Their opponent will be Godzilla, King of the Monsters. Actually, it should be Gojira, but I’m just another stupid American who has watched the butcheries of the Japanese films too often. Godzilla is about 400 feet tall and breathes some sort of nuclear fire. He is not the Big Lizard from the 1998 film. That is America being even stupider than usual.
The Knights of the Dinner Table are the current champions of this site, although only two-thirds of the membership has made an appearance. B.A. Felton typically serves as the GM of the group, while gaming legend Johnny Kizinski has moved away but is still a member in good standing with the Knights. As for Dr. Evil, he’s a key part of the rich history of this page. He’s the winner of the very first fight posted on this site and has already shown up in the Contest of Champions in a loss to the Tick. I had unofficially retired him, but like a bad penny, he keeps resurfacing.
Mario is the lovable video game character who has gotten completely out of hand during these fights and has turned into a nefarious super villain bent on world domination and/or destruction. He’s the current champion of this page, and seems nearly unstoppable. The Knights of the Dinner Table previously defeated the Fantastic Four, and are looking to score a win against the nearly unbeatable video game juggernaut.
This is a special four-round fight. Each member of a team will get one round during which he or she gets to fight a member of the opposition. Whoever wins the most rounds at the end of the battle wins the fight.
The Knights of the Dinner Table are the gaming group from hell. Members include:
- Brian: Rules lawyer extraordinaire.
- Sara: the only one who actually tries to role-play.
- Bob: That hacking ‘n’ slashing dwarf-playing rogue.
- Dave: Another hack ‘n’ slasher who never enters a game without a Hackmaster +12
The Fantastic Four are arguably the world’s greatest super heroes. Members include:
- Mr. Fantastic: A brilliant scientist who can stretch a lot.
- The Invisible Woman: A chick who can turn invisible.
- The Human Torch: You should know it from the name.
- The Thing: A classic comic book brick.