Elminster versus Dr. Strange

Who is the real master of mystical arts?I brought Elminster in way back in the third fight ever on this page, where he lost to Gandalf the Grey. Since then, a lot has changed. There have been two and a half new editions of Dungeons & Dragons released. In the most recent edition, the Forgotten Realms got largely blown up and Elminster wound up losing much of his power and absorbing the souls of many dying wizards. He is now bitter, old, and more crazy than usual (and, in my mind, a lot cooler). Dr. Strange, on the other hand, is a newcomer to the Screamsheet. Once the Sorcerer Supreme of the Marvel Universe, he also wound up losing most of his power after he almost became addicted to black magic. He still has a smattering of magical arts left and is an excellent martial artist. Perhaps not coincidentally, he also wound up getting cooler after being depowered, and showed off some really awesome weirdness in the miniseries Strange. Now these two old has-beens get to go at each other’s throats for our amusement. Some things don’t change.

Round One:
The battle takes place in a remote badland where the two enchanters can’t harm anyone else with their magic and where they can’t make a quick getaway if things get hairy. As neither magician is what they once were, they begin duking it out in a physical manner – Strange with his mastery of the martial arts, and Elminster with his enchanted longsword. The sword wins at first, as it is three feet of razor-sharp steel versus Strange’s fists. However, after several thousand years of life and spending most of the last century whiling his time away on a farm, Elminster’s skills are a bit rusty – and he wasn’t even much of a fighter in his adventuring days. Even with the enchantments on his sword making him seem like a better combatant than he really is, Strange manages to dodge his blows and eventually gets under Elminster’s guard, where he delivers a series of fast punches right to the old mage’s jaw. Round One goes to Doctor Strange.

Round Two:
Nursing a broken nose, Elminster decides that even with his magical power waning, a physical fight will not be the way he wins this battle. He drops his sword and makes a quick retreat backwards. In D&D terms, he takes a five-foot step back, preventing an opportunity attack from Dr. Strange while he casts a spell. Strange counters with some magic of his own, but he’s got some problems. His hands have gone back to being shaky and useless since he gave up being the Sorcerer Supreme, so he can’t conjure up the Crimson Bands of Cyttorak or any other cool spells. All he can muster is a bit of mystical shielding that Elminster’s more potent magic quickly burns away. Pretty soon, Elminster has used a fire spell to scorch Strange. In honor of his foe, Elminster contemplates naming the spell something the lines of crimson bands of burning facial hair, but then goes for the more traditional Elminster’s enkindling emission. Round Two goes to Elminster.

Round Three:
Dr. Strange, as his name implies, is a brilliant surgeon. While he knows that the burns caused by Elminster’s spell will likely scar him for life, he also knows several people capable of giving him the skin grafts and plastic surgery he needs to return to his Tony Stark-like good looks. So instead of rolling around and beating the flames out, he surprises Elminster by charging forward and grappling with him, letting the flames catch on the old sage’s robes and lighting his opponent on fire. Once Elminster is ablaze, Strange stops, drops, and rolls. Elminster does the same, but his long, flowing robes are all extra flammable material that helps the fire spread very quickly. He can’t roll fast enough to keep the fire from consuming him. In the past, it would be time for him to rattle off a couple of spells and put the fire out with a snap. However, most of the spells he knows now light fires, but don’t put them out. He thinks of a ritual that might do the trick, then realizes that he doesn’t have the proper components. And anyway, by the time he could use said ritual, he’d be burned to a crisp. Which, by now, he totally is. Strange leaves the pile of scorched robes and blackened beard hair and heads for a burn ward. Round Three and the fight go to Doctor Strange.

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One Response to “Elminster versus Dr. Strange”

  1. david edwards Says:

    hell no doctor strange would not stand a chance against a archmage such as elminster

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