Mario versus Luigi

Will Luigi finally defeat his glory-hogging brother?

Nintendo’s iconic characters, Mario and Luigi have been adventuring together since Mario Brothers. And while Mario has had his fair share of experience on this site, Luigi has thus far been relegated to team-ups where he pairs with his brother. There comes a time in every person’s life when they want to jump up and grab the glory for themselves, and this is Luigi’s time. Now it’s red guy versus green guy, and only one of the Mario brothers will get to walk away.

Round One

Mario has had it with his mooching brother living off of his fame for so long. To that end, he has decided to do away with Luigi. He powers up with a fireflower and marches off to incinerate his green-clad brother. Seeing the fire in Mario’s eyes, not to mention to fireballs in his hands, Luigi lets his natural cowardice take over and runs for the hills. Mario gives chase, lobbing fireball and just barely missing his brother. Luigi manages to use his jumping abilities and speed to keep from getting torched by his older brother, but it seems like it’s only a matter of time before a fireball lands and Luigi heads off to that big “Game Over” screen in the sky. Round One goes to Mario.

Round Two

Unknown to Mario, the whole “Luigi is a coward” thing is merely a façade that Luigi has used while he has surreptitiously planned for this day. Knowing that his brother was unstable, as demonstrated way back in the 1980s when he went berserk and kidnapped Donkey Kong, Luigi has spent the years acting as a buffoon and a coward while memorizing the location of every strategic powerup he could. He disappears over a rise on a hill after narrowly dodging one of Mario’s fire blasts, and Mario thinks he’s finally got his little brother cornered. Much to his surprise, Luigi hops back into view having grabbed an invincibility star, which turns the tables completely. Luigi hits Mario, depowering him and taking away his ability to shoot fire. Suddenly it is Mario on the run while Luigi presses his advantage. Round Two goes to Luigi.

Round Three

Luigi chases Mario down through a seemingly endless variety of screens. Since both brothers run at the same speed, Mario manages to keep ahead of Luigi until his invincibility runs out. Then Mario turns and engages his brother in hand-to-hand combat. Luigi’s wiry and has the advantage of better reach, but Mario has weight and the ability to take punches better than his brother. He bowls into Luigi and starts throttling the green guy. Luigi kicks Mario in the groin to daze him, then presses his thumbs into Mario’s eyes. The fight continues with cheap shots, hair-pulling, and all the dirty tricks that usually get kept behind the scenes when it comes to make a Super Mario Brothers game.

Finally, Mario grabs Luigi and slams his head into a brick. In his blind rage, though, he neglected to notice that it was a “POW!” block from the old original Mario Brothers game. So while Luigi is dazed by the impact, Mario gets knocked off his feet as everything in the area gets shaken as though by a minor explosion. Luigi recovers first and picks up the “POW!” block, then slams it twice more into Mario’s head, flattening the red-clad plumber. Mario shrugs his shoulders and falls off the screen, signaling his demise for now. Luigi takes the day, and Mario will have to wait for somebody to press “Continue” before returning for vengeance. Round Three and the fight go to Luigi.

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